Thursday, April 29, 2010

A Rendezvous with Ebony and Ivory

I'm happy to say that I just had a surprisingly pleasant evening.

Rewind to a few days ago. A client called me up in the office and asked me if I'm into music. Now, this is a 70-year old woman asking me if I like music so I wasn't really sure if that was a trick question or what. So I said yes (a bit hesitantly, I think). She then asked me if I wanted to go to a piano concert, because if so, she could get me free tickets. What do you answer to that???

OK, the last time I watched a piano concert was about 15 years ago. I was still in high school then, and you can just imagine the effort I put into trying to stay awake. Don't get me wrong, the artist was very good (it was Cecile Licad, for crying out loud!) and I also appreciate classical music. But I was still very young then and I have not yet developed that 'cultured' side of me (ehem!), so you could say that I found it too mature for my liking.

So armed with my iced Cafe Mocha and the determination not to fall asleep, I went to the event with my victim, Jude. We were actually a bit surprised that it was well-attended, and that the age-group wasn't as old as I initially feared. In fact, there were several young people there (read: people my age) and lots of personalities often seen in the society pages. Apparently, the concert was courtesy of the Ambassador of Israel and the Arts Council of Cebu, and it featured two young Israeli pianists: Yaron Kohlberg and Bishara Harouni.

Suffice it to say that I didn't fall asleep, and I even enjoyed the whole performance. The two guys were very talented (it also didn't hurt that they were both good-looking, hehe) and both played their solos and duets wonderfully. All emotions were beautifully conveyed with every stroke of the piano keys, and seeing them play was very mesmerizing. I thought to myself, if I had only finished my piano lessons and took them to heart, I'd probably be as good as they are now. Haha! Yeah, right.

Seriously though, what I admired most about them was their passion for music. It was very evident that they love what they do. I have always been jealous of people like that, and I've often wondered what that feels like. I'm thinking maybe, if you love what you're doing, you would gladly spend every bit of your time and energy on it until you think you have nothing left, and still find the heart to do it all over again the next day. You might experience all the disappointments, hurts and frustrations, but nothing else can also give you that much joy and peace. How I wish I could find my true passion! But I digress. That's too deep a realization for an hour of Chopin and Schubert.

All in all, I'm glad that I was asked to go that concert and I'm glad that I did. Aside from the wonderful music, it also brought back good memories and it gave me a much-needed kick to go after what I really want. As they say, things always happen for a reason and that we are where we were meant to be.

Sunday, April 04, 2010

Act your Age

People, especially older ones, often say: "Act your age!"

But does anybody really know how to do that? Not me, definitely.

If the 2 "first things" I did on my birthday were any indication of my age, you'd probably think I just turned 18 or something. (Notice the subtle self-flattery there? :P) Subconsciously, maybe I was trying to do these hoping to turn back time or maybe suspend it for just a little while.

So here are the 'non-adult' things I've done recently. Nothing major, but still...:

First Thing #8 - Not being allowed to drive my own car after partying.
No, I didn't get grounded by my parents. Worse. I wasn't allowed by my friends I was partying with, to drive myself home. It's kind of embarrassing actually. Does that mean, the fact that they didn't think I was fit to drive, sort of translates to me finally getting drunk? Huh.

All those who know me, know very well that I have an insanely high tolerance for alcohol. I can probably outdrink any macho guy (and I did, once or twice) and not feel a thing, save for a little dizziness. But that night I wasn't in the right mental and physical condition. I was tired and only had 4 hours of sleep, that's why I easily fell prey to intoxication. Damn you, Absinthe!

Anyway, I was forced to leave my car in the mall parking lot and a friend brought me home by cab. I went back the next day to get it, and got an unexpected birthday surprise: a P1,000 overnight parking fee. Now, this would have been number 9 on my 'first things' list had I not experienced this before. ;)

But let me make this clear, I am very much against drunk driving. And kids, don't drink and drive!

First Thing #9 - Take an exam with a hangover.
So after the early morning partying mentioned above (I went home around 2am), I woke up at 6am to take the FSO exam. My mom accompanied me to the exam venue, and she wondered where my car was. I just told her vaguely, "I left it in BTC".

Anyway, the whole thing is a bit hazy. Everyone there must've thought I was a bit of a loser because I kept dozing off while waiting for the exam to start. But I had to do this with my head upright or everything around me starts spinning. I was sleepy, hungry and hungover. (I also forgot to bring a pen, when it was specifically mentioned to bring one. So I ended up borrowing from the proctor. Yup, now I'm positive they thought I was a loser.)

I've never gone to class, let alone take an exam, with a hangover before even when I was in college. (I may have been late for an exam, or have dozed off while taking one. But that's another story.) That's why I kinda found it funny that I had to do this now, for a very important exam at that.

I can't remember much of the questions now and I'm surprised I even got to answer them. But I was the second one to finish the exam! I'm just not sure if it's because the exam was easy or because I was just really eager to be done with it. I'm praying that I pass, though. Hopefully, Lady Luck was smiling down upon me and will let me pass just because it's my birthday. :)

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So those were the 2 crazy things I did on my special day. Just a little clarification, though. The things I have been doing and writing about here are not necessarily on my Bucket List (who, in their right mind, hopes to take an exam while drunk, before dying?). I'd like to think that I have more meaningful and less selfish aspirations than these. :P

All I'm doing is trying out new things I've never done before. It makes life more interesting, don't you think? So go out there and do things you've never done before. It doesn't have to be big or bold, just as long as it's something new.
As Charles Muntz of the movie Up says, "Adventure is out there!"

Saturday, April 03, 2010

Musings of a 30-year old child

I intended to publish this post on my birthday, but I wasn't able to. Life got in the way, I guess. Better late than never, right?

I don't know why my birthday always makes me melancholic. Maybe it's because that day forces me to take a step back and reflect on how my past year went. It's hard to be confronted with ghosts of the past who, more often than not, turn out to be unwelcome guests. It's kind of a downer when you find yourself faced with past actions that you're not proud of, or worse, be riddled with thoughts of "shoulda, woulda, coulda's".

So you can just imagine how my 30th is an especially dreaded event. As a kid, I have already thought of the things I will do and have when I'm older. In my mind, by age 30 I would be a successful career woman (my career varied depending on my mood- I'd be a theater actress, an Oscar-winning director, a lawyer, an architect, or a diplomat), I'd have my own house and own car, I'd be rich, have travelled the world, and I'd have someone special by my side. Well, if my 10-year old self saw me now, she'd be sorely disappointed (think Bruce Willis' The Kid).

However, I thought, why should I waste my time being depressed when I could choose to embrace life and celebrate it? As the song Point of View goes, "Can't you see, life's easy? If you consider things in another point of view". Life could be good or bad, depending on how you look at it.

That's why instead of moping around and griping about old age and things I haven't got and done, I've decided to list down things I'm grateful for. Things that have made my 30 years emotion-filled, colorful and wonderful ones. My life may not have turned out the way I imagined and wanted it to be, but I can say that I am very much ok with it. I have been very blessed.

So please indulge me with a little mushiness here. You know I'm not typically sentimental and all gooey inside, so I'm pleading temporary insanity and I'm blaming this on alcohol and old age! :)

Here goes. I'm thankful/grateful for:

1. My parents. Well, aside from the most obvious reason that I wouldn't be here without them, I'm thankful that they are who they are. You gotta be made of tough stuff to raise a child like me, given that I have always been outspoken, strong-willed and independent. So for them to put up with my craziness for 30 years, they deserve to be considered for sainthood at the very least. They've showered us with love, given me and my siblings a comfortable life, often making sacrifices to shield us from pain and hardships. And for that I will forever be grateful.

2. My siblings. Growing up with 3 younger siblings has been a fun ride. It was always nice to have someone to bully. Haha! Just kidding. Seriously, I couldn't imagine growing up without my brothers and sister. They have been unwilling witnesses to my infamous mood swings, and a loyal audience to my jokes and funny antics. We've survived several adventures and misadventures, often with scraped knees and bruised arms. We have had our differences and gone through rough patches in the past, but what brother or sister has not experienced that? At the end of the day, we're still bound by love and blood, and nothing can change that. I love you guys dearly and will fight for you to the death. I am and will always be your Ate.

3. Friends. How lonely would life be, if one doesn't have friends! Best friends, good friends, work friends, college friends, high school friends, old friends and new friends: I thank all of you for being there with me in my life's highs and lows. In some way or another, you have shaped me into who I am now. Life's a party with all of you around. :)

4. Health. I'm far from being fit or in shape, but I'm just thankful that I don't have any illness or disease. I don't care if I don't have a Victoria's Secret model body, as long as I'm not sick I'm happy.

5. My job. It may not be my dream job and I may gripe about it often, but I am still very thankful that I have it. In this current economic environment, I am very lucky to be employed as I'm sure there are millions out there who'd die to trade places with me. If not for my job, I won't have money (obviously), I'd never have been able to travel, and I'd never have met some of the most wonderful people I now call friends. So, thank you, job! :)

6. Books. Growing up without books would have been a nightmare! They have been my constant companions (together with TV) all throughout my childhood. They have opened up the world to me and have showed me some of the best adventures of my life. I wouldn't have known Harry, Mr. Darcy and the Corleones or have gone to Mordor, Neverland, and Tara without them. I'd say me and books, have the greatest love affair.

7. Being Filipino. The Philippines may be far from perfect-- what with poverty, corruption, huge foreign debt, and all the other problems facing it-- but I'd never trade it for any other country. How can one not love the wonderful weather, magnificent natural resources, and amazing people? I guess that's why we're one of the happiest people in the world, because we always manage to see the brighter side in every bad situation. I love the Philippines, warts and all. I just hope all the other Filipinos see what I see in her.

8. Self-love. This one's 30 years in the making. It's more than being self-confident and believing in myself. I love myself enough to embrace my flaws and accept that they are part of who I am. I am more comfortable in my own skin now, and I couldn't care less what people think of how I look. I have my own opinions and am not afraid to share them (as long as I don't hurt anyone, of course). Love starts with one's self. If you don't love your own self, who else would?

9. Being a woman. I used to wish I had been a guy, because I thought I could do more- travel alone to different places, get ahead in the corporate ladder, et cetera. But I have slowly realized that I could do all those things and more. I have seen lots of women change the world, and they do it with much passion, strength, and grace. I've never been more proud of being a woman!

10. Being Alive. This I owe to God. He's the one who's given me life, and He could easily take it away. I guess the reason why I'm still here is that I have yet to serve my purpose on Earth. I'm not sure yet on what His plans for me are, but I know I'll be fine because He is with me.


The list is long, but since I'm not here to write a novel, the 10 will do for now. Suffice it to say that I have a million other things to be thankful for, and all of them will forever be treasured in my heart.

P.S. My 30th birthday celebration was a blast, thanks to a 3-day weekend partying. I had so much fun, too much booze, and too many things to do that I didn't have time to wallow in self-pity. Cheers to 30!

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Paramore

I have heard of Paramore's songs before-- That's What You Get and Ignorance -- but I have never really been a fan of theirs. Oddly, they remind me of Sixpence None the Richer, only more rock.

But when I heard the cover they did for Kings of Leon's Use Somebody, I thought they're pretty good. I even like their version more than the original.



I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see
Painted faces fill the places I can't reach
You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody

Someone like you and all you know and how you speak
Countless lovers under cover of the street
You know that I could use somebody
You know that I could use somebody
Someone like you

Off in the night while you live it up I'm off to sleep
Waging wars to shake the poet and the beat
I hope it's gonna make you notice
I hope it's gonna make you notice

Someone like me, someone like me
Someone like me, somebody

I'm ready now, I'm ready now
I'm ready now, I'm ready now
I'm ready now, I'm ready now
I'm ready now

Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody
Someone like you, somebody

I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see


But their best song yet, in my opinion, is The Only Exception. It may have weak vocals, especially in the chorus part (hmm, I sounded a bit like an American Idol judge there), but I really like the lyrics. Reminds me of someone? Eherm. Haha.



When I was younger
I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind
He broke his own heart
And I watched
As he tried to reassemble it
And my momma swore that
She would never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I'd never sing of love
If it does not exist

But darlin'
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception

Maybe I know, somewhere
Deep in my soul
That love never lasts
And we've got to find other ways
To make it alone
Or keep a straight face
And I've always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable, distance
And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I'm content
With loneliness
Because none of it was ever worth the risk

You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception

I've got a tight grip on reality, but I can't
Let go of what's in front of me here
I know you're leaving in the morning, when you wake up
Leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream
Ooh Ooh...

You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception

And I'm on my way to believing
Oh, and I'm on my way to believing